This post is going to take a couple different directions. . So bear with me here!
I have a problem....
Tonight is my monthly school board meeting & I am out of Pizza Rolls!!! But more than that I need prayers for the meeting tonight. I ask that you specifically pray for the right words from my mouth (without getting angry), I ask you to pray that the other members are open to 2 specific things being presented that I feel strongly about. One of them has been put off too long. I would appreciate the prayers!
Ok here is where we get honest. This whole week I have been struggling with putting God before my kids. I know that God is to be numero uno... But I struggle with putting ANYTHING in front of my kids. Not only that, our spouse is to come before our kids. As if I wasn't having a hard enough time!
Don't get me wrong here I love God but do I love him MORE than my kids. I would like to be able to say yes without reservation but I'm afraid I have been questioning that as of late. For too long I lived for me, me, me. What I deserved, what I needed. Blah blah blah!
My relationship with Jesus Christ is stronger now then ever which is why I probably question it. I want nothing more but to please Him. I don't want to stand one day at the judgement throne & look back on my life & be ashamed of how I lived.
What do YOU put in front of God?!?!
4 comments:
I am right there with you my friend. I do not have the answers on this one but I would venture to say just about every mom who reads this feels the same. Don't we all find though, that when we put Him first all those other relationships are that much stronger. I think maybe we take it to literally. I don't think God wants us to neglect our kids or spouse or put them on the backburner for His sake...He just wants our relationship with him to be #1 priority otherwise we will fail as spouses and parents. When we pray all throughout the day aren't we putting Him first...When we do our early morning devotions before anyone else is up aren't we putting Him first. When our spouse or kids accomplish something and we give God the praise and glory aren't we putting him first... Maybe it's easier than we think ;)
My family is a "blended" family. I am what is known as a "package deal". Hubs came into a family. I told him up front my kids will always be first. The result of this is that I did not allow him to be a father and I did such damage to his relationship with my kids.
I put God on a back burner for so long, that my "wake up" call was a hard one. He not only had to knock me to my knees, He had to put my face in the dirt.
Once you realize that everything, and I mean EVERYTHING is to come after God, you will find that your life is put into a whole new perspective. You will see things the way God wants you to see them. The hard part is putting Him first. I have to pray that He reminds me of what my priorities should be and in what order. I have to pray for the strength to do what He says and not what I want. It is a most difficult journey. Especially since we are taught by society that God is always last if at all.
You can do this! It will be hard no doubt about it. But with the help of your Savior, you will learn the right lesson. My prayers are with you.
K. Here I am. I'm going to have to ditto alot of Andrea here. I don't think He expects you to neglect your kids or your husband for Him. I have noticed when I begin to feel the way you are feeling, it's not my kids or my husband that are the problem, its my selfishness with my time. I struggle with that alot. The fact that you are aware says you are in the right place. Don't be so hard on yourself. God doesn't expect perfection. And when we fall off that pedestal we tend to put ourselves on, He is still there. (Man we have a lot in common.) You have an awesome couple of kids and your marriage is strong. I'd say you are better at making God your first priority than you think. And now off to take my own advice:).
I'm with Susan on this one. I think God is #1 more than you might realize. And I'm going to quote our dear friend Lauren (who I think quoted someone else when she spoke at Mt Lebanon this past spring), we honor God a nickel at a time...every time you fill that sippy cup, every time you minister to your children, every time you glory in HIS name when you hear them discussing Him in the back seat of your car. You sit Him at #1 every time you are a spiritual role model for them... but also every time you fill the role in their lives that He put you in, as their mother. Every time you respect His will for your life and theirs, you are doing it in His name. He chose you as their mother and LOVES it when you do His will with such grace and devotion. If that's not putting him 1st, I don't know what is.
BUT...if you're feeling convicted, and it sounds like you are, pray about it...even discuss it with your Ed and your kids and let them know what's on your heart.
You, Lord, give perfect peace to those who keep their purpose firm and put their trust in You. -Isaiah 26:3 (TEV) from Day 3 of The Purpose Driven Life
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